We see it all the time; young people getting married straight out of college or even straight out of high school.
It appears to have almost become a type of trend for our generation.
Once you get to be about 23 years old, all you seem to see on your Facebook page is notifications informing you that half of your graduate class is either married, having babies or both.
This makes you think about whether it is normal to be getting married at such a young age, after all, a century or so ago, people were being married off at 14. You might even wonder if you are falling behind or whether you should just get it over with and ask your significant other to tie the knot. Well, do not fret. Studies show that 60% of couples, who get married between the ages of 20 to 25, will end up getting divorced.
So if you are feeling rushed by all you high school and college mates who seem far too eager to get started on their families, then perhaps it is time to enlighten yourself in all the reasons why you should not consider marrying young.
Table of Contents
Find Yourself
College is a time to find yourself.
You will meet so many new people who are all trying out a bunch of personalities and activities in order to find out who they are and who they want to be – and you should be doing the same.
You are only young once and this is the only time you get to be completely selfish.
You need to go out in the world to experience new things, and to find yourself.
This does not mean that you should go out with a new person every night – chances are you will pick something up that will last far longer than your one night stand. However, it might be wise to get to know a few different people. If you were lucky enough to meet the love of your life in high school or college then hold onto them but do not let them disrupt your self-discovery, and do not disrupt theirs.
Travel
This is the perfect time to travel. You are young, you are healthy and you will most likely never look better in a swimsuit than you do now.
If you are very lucky, your parents will pay for your travels, but if you have to fend for yourself, then there are many programs you can join that allow students to work and travel, all expenses paid.
You might want to take a gap year to travel and experience new things, or you can study abroad.
There are so many options when you are young. It is the perfect time to experience all these things.
Once you are married, you will be tied down and you will have so many responsibilities that make it very hard to experience true freedom.
Become Independent
It is important to become independent before you get married.
Far too many people (especially women) get married with the belief that their spouse will support them.
This does not only have the potential to cause resentment between a husband and wife but it can cause serious damage in the case of a divorce.
Imagine you are financially dependent on your spouse and they decide to leave you.
You will be left with no money and no valuable skills or qualifications. Thus you will probably have to move in with your parents and start from scratch.
Before entering into a marriage, both people should be independent on all levels.
Career
Before you get married, you need to focus on your career. It is important to figure out what you want to do with your life before you enter into marriage.
Many people have gotten married very young and allowed their spouse to significantly influence their career choices, leading them down the wrong career path.
This is especially the case in scenarios where the woman would end up getting pregnant and the man would drop out of school, get a mediocre job and get married because it is “the right thing to do”. This simply derails everybody’s lives and leads to intense resentment and heartbreak.
So, first focus on your career, no matter what the circumstance.
You will be a much better spouse and parent if you finish your studies and build a stable career.